Fairy Opera Chapter 20: Robin Hood

 

Robin Hood

“So what, exactly, happened to the Rebellion?” Everyone stood around the captain’s room’s table.

Allen pointed to the map. “During the night, a force of undead came from nowhere and caught our entire headquarters by surprise. The battle was intense, but the undead won. I was able to escape by hiding inside of an oubliette.”

“You’re the prophesized hero.” Jak crossed his arms. “Why did you run?”

“I didn’t want to be the hero!” Allen was almost yelling. “I never chose this. I wanted to live my life as a merchant and travel the world!”

“Ah, yeah. We get that.” Jastle shrugged. “I mean, that’s the reason I went into hiding.”

“So what now?” Jak turned to me. “You’re the one who started this journey. What do we do now?”

I thought for a moment. “We’re going to become Robin Hood.”

“Who’s that?” Jak turned to me.

“It’s an old tale my mom used to tell me before she died. Robin Hood was a pirate and an outcast just like us, who stole from the rich to give back to the poor.”

“So you want to do what he did.” Jak lifted his chin.

“What else can we do? We want to oppose the Empire whatever way we can. There are hundreds of corrupt nobles who are draining the peasantry dry. People starve to death every day. And eventually we may even be able to figure out what’s going on with the Empire and the undead.”

Jak sighed. “Okay. I’m with you.”

Muco and Burgon looked at each other.

Muco nodded. “I really don’t care at all about the first part of your plan, but I do want to continue my investigation into the missing souls.”

Burgon nodded as well. “I agree with my colleague.”

Jastle shrugged. “Sure. I mean, it’s better than what I was doing before.”

“I’m with you.” Tae crossed her arms. “I want to change things, and this could be the only way for us to go forward with that.”

Allen looked between myself and Tae. “You guys are the best.”

Ruby flew around the table. “That’s fine by me!”

“Then we’re unanimous.” Jak grinned. “So we’re going to need a target.”

“A corrupt noble who lives on an island close to here. Who we can steal riches off of and hand them out to the poor.”

Jastle smiled. “I have one. Duke Chuke Banstrom.”

“Ah, I know him.” Allen shuddered. “He’s the master of the man who killed several prominent rebel members.”

“Good.” Jak clapped his hands. “We’re going to give him what’s up. He’s probably got a lot of riches around there. We’ll liberate that gold and then head to Billerstrang to distribute it.”

“Billerstrang?” I looked at Jak.

Jak shook his head. “Billerstrang is famous for being a place where trash is dumped. The people there live off of the heaps of trash. Anyone can disappear there and never be found by the Empire, or anyone else, again.”

“Then that’s a great place to improve with the wealth we’ll steal from that noble.” I put my fist on the table. “Set course for Duke Banstrom’s castle!”

The ship turned around and we headed north towards the island where Duke Banstrom’s castle was located. The trip took about two weeks, during which I continued my magic training under Jastle. Allen happened to be really good with the sword and helped me out with daily sparring sessions. I was beginning to become quite the fighter. When I looked at myself in the mirror I saw I had lost all that baby softness that I had before I left on the journey.

The Duke’s island appeared on the horizon on the second week. Jastle called a meeting in the captain’s quarters.

“I’ve faked us some documentation. It says that we’re a trading ship that just unloaded its goods in Ungerton and is heading to the Duke’s castle to buy fleece. There’s a significant sheep industry in the Duke’s territory.”

“Make sure everyone has the same story.” Jak looked around. “We’re just a merchant ship. If anyone asks why we have cannon, mention the merchant protection act.”

Allen shook his head. “Which shouldn’t cover us but—” He was cut off.

“I’ve got that paperwork forged too. We just have to keep our story straight.” Jastle looked around the table. “Are we good?”

I raised my hand. “Oh, and we’re running a bit low on food, water, and lime juice.”

“Right. We’ll purchase that with the pirate’s gold. I’m pretty sure it’s untraceable.” Jastle clapped his hands. “We have our jobs! Let’s go!”

We docked at the castle’s main dock, which was crowded with ships. No one even batted an eye when we pulled through and moored at an empty slot.

The dock manager approached us.

“You’re not on my manifest.” He looked like the scrooge type.

Jastle handed over the documentation. The man peered over it.

“Okay. You’re good. We’ll have the fleece loaded in a day.”

I leaned close to Jak. “What are we actually going to do with a boatload of fleece?”

Jak shook his head. “Sell it and add the profits to our war chest. I’m sure someone at Billerstrange needs new coats.”

We handed several gold coins to the dock manager and were passed through. We entered the castle town, which was bustling. Shops selling all sorts of goods lined the street. The castle, built into the side of a large cliff, overlooked the entire town. Even though this noble was apparently very corrupt, the place appeared to be thriving.

Jastle pulled us into an alleyway. He pointed to a door with a strange symbol on it. “That’s the symbol of the thieves’ guild.”

It was myself, Jak, Jastle, Tae, Ruby, and Allen in the away party.

Jastle knocked on the door. A small slot opened and someone looked out. “What you want?”

“We’re looking to pull off a heist.”

“Eh? For who?”

“The Duke.”

The man behind the door laughed. “Let me see your ring.”

Jastle showed a ring that I had not noticed previously. It was shining, made of gold, with a large emerald embedded in it. The letter R was engraved on it.

The door opened. We stepped through into a small back room that was surrounded by shelving.

Jastle looked around. “This guild office is pretty barebones.”

The man who had let us in shrugged. “The Duke has a pretty harsh hand against thieves in this town. If you’re caught stealing bread, you lose a hand. Anything else and you’re hanged.” The man was wearing a thick, dark cloak, that hid his face. His knees were bent. Mottled blisters covered his hands. He sat down in a chair. “So how can I help you?”

“We’re planning a heist. We’re going to steal from the Duke.”

“And what do you hope to accomplish with this?”

“We want to cause havoc. We want to cause trouble to the Empire.”

“Then you’d be best off killing the Duke entirely. Why steal from him when he’ll be after you forever?”

“I, ah, I really have no answer.”

“Here’s the rub.” The man leaned forward. “The Duke’s got some people who don’t like him. To the point where they’d be willing to help you pull of a coup. When you do so, they’ll be sure to give you a bit of that honey, if you get my drift. So why don’t you use that magic skill of yours and help out an entire town, instead of just stealing for the thrills.”

“How did you know about our magic?”

“I’m a perceptive man, I am.”

Jastle extended his hand. “My name is Jastle.”

“Grub.” The man shook Jastle’s hand.

Jastle sat down on a crate. “So can you introduce us to these fellows who want Duke Banstrom out?”

“Right. It’s the Duke’s cousin’s son. He technically has a claim to the title.” Grub rubbed his hands together. “He’s a bit soft in the heart, but not in a way that makes him soft, if you get my drift.”

“Okay.”

“See, the kid’s name is Andrew. He says he has dirt on the Duke that, if exposed, will send him into exile.”

“What kind of dirt?” Jastle appeared interested.

“Only Andrew knows. If you link up with Andrew, then perhaps you could help us all out while lining your own pockets.” Grub shrugged. “But it’s up to you.”

“Introduce us to Andrew.” Jastle stood up.

“Great.” Grub rubbed his hands together again. “Five percent.”

“Of what?”

“Whatever you make off with, of course. And if you skimp me, I’ll be sure to get my dues.”

“Sure. The money really isn’t our mission anyways.” Jastle turned to me. “Does that sound reasonable?”

“It does.” I stood up. “Where should we meet with Andrew?”

“Here.” Grub shuffled into an adjacent room. “Let me write a letter.” He wrote something on a piece of paper and took a pigeon out from a cage. He wrapped the note to the pigeon’s leg and released it. It flapped out of the window.

“Give it a few hours. When dusk falls, come to the Green Dagon pub.” Grub sat back down in his chair and lit a pipe. “I’m happy to host you for a while longer. But don’t you have work to attend to?”

“Right. We’re ostensibly merchants who are trading fleece.” I got up. “Let’s go do our jobs and look like actual merchants.”

We left the thieves’ guild and returned to the dock. The fleece was already being loaded. The trader was discussing with Yarrow and Muco. Muco waved at us as we approached.

Jastle engaged in the trade as well. Since I had no trading experience, I turned to Tae and asked her if she wanted to see the town.

“Sure.” Tae turned to Jak. “How about you?”

“You two have some time to yourselves.” Jak shook his head. “I’m going to help with our cover story. My goodness, that is some high quality fleece. I can see why this dock is so crowded.” He walked towards the place where the negotiations were happening.

I looked at Tae. She smiled and nodded. Ruby fluttered between us and then sat on my shoulder.

“Shall we be off?” Ruby kicked her legs back and forth.

Tae, myself, and Ruby returned to the marketplace. Even though the Duke was apparently a very draconian ruler, the place was booming. Dozens of shoppers wandered the stalls, looking for the best deal, or haggling with the owners.

We came to a shop that was selling apples. Tae took out two coppers and bought us two apples.

I cut a small slice off my apple and gave it to Ruby. She took it and started eating. I took a bite. The apple was good. Not as good as the stuff back home, but it was something considering that I’d been eating hard tack and gruel with salt pork for the last month. It would be no problem stocking up on food for our next journey.

I saw a crowd in the square next to the castle’s wall. Tae and I walked to the back of the mass to see what was going on. Apparently someone was being hanged. The crowd, though, was a bit different in mood from other hangings I had witnessed. They didn’t seem to be enjoying it. In fact, they were quite subdued, whispering amongst themselves. I leaned close to the nearest person and asked.

“What’s going on?”

“The mayor’s boy is being killed.”

“Why?” I tilted my head.

“He insulted the Duke’s son.”

“And that’s recourse for hanging?”

The citizen shook his head. “Duke Banstrom’s son is a nasty piece of work.” He then clamped his mouth. “I better not say any more.” He looked around as if he was being watched. “It’s best if you don’t get involved, outsider.”

I looked up at the man standing beneath the noose. There was something strange about the whole situation.

I just needed to know how to act.

 

21

***

Unexpected and Unrefusable: Why I think we should nationalize healthcare (back an integral)

 Now I'm a libertarian at heart, and I believe that the government should only stick its hands into things that are completely necessary. However, like I explained in a previous article, there are some things where I believe the government should handle things. In that article I talked about farm subsidies. In this one I'll talk about healthcare. 

When the founding fathers put together this country, "healthcare" as we think of it today didn't even exist. What healthcare there was was comprised of heroin, mercury, and leeches. (A bit of an overstatement but not far off the mark.) Nobody understood the behemoth costs associated with the modern healthcare establishment. And as such they didn't plan for it within the constitution. 

There are two things I believe put healthcare squarely in the same category as roads and libraries: healthcare is usually unexpected and unrefusable. You cannot plan ahead for cancer. It strikes out of nowhere. You cannot refuse treatment for cancer. If you do, you die. 

Now what about insurance? Surely that should solve the problem! But here's the rub: insurers are not in the game to benefit you. They're there's solely to make a buck off of you. This is okay when you're choosing between kettle chips and crinkled chips at the store--when you buy from a normal company, you have choice. But when you need lifesaving surgery now, the insurance company doesn't have your best interests at heart. If you think of the healthcare system as a whole, insurance is a vampire that sucks away resources from the most vulnerable when they need support the most. In a world without insurance there are less people who are asking to get paid. 

The main argument that I hear when people disagree with nationalized healthcare is that it is of inferior quality. When the government pays for everything there is no incentive to improve, no incentive to do things better. This may be the case, yes. But Americans are paying out the wazoo for this "privilege." The question one must ask is this: do we support a system that systematically destroys the lives of those who use it through massive quantities of medical debt; or do we support a system where a number of people who qualify for life-saving surgery won't get it in time because of medical mismanagement and overload? I don't know the numbers here but if anecdotes from people living in the UK and Canada are anything to judge by, then this really isn't much of a problem at all. 

Near-mandatory insurance for an American who wants to not die from an unexpected cancer diagnosis is something I do not think benefits the person or society. Insurance is scummy. Everyone knows the cliché of the slimy insurance salesman. Why do people believe that medical insurance is any more moral? 

The government, at least in Western nations, wants to help you. Like, they want you to be alive and like them so that you vote for them. While this paradigm is reversed almost everywhere else, when it comes to healthcare, the government really does have your best interest at heart. (Not because they're paragons, but because they want you to be alive and voting for them.) And the government is used to footing huge bills with little chance of return on investment. I'd rather pay the government what I would pay in insurance through taxes than pay a scummy insurance company who only wants to use me as a long-term investment. When designing economic and societal systems, one must not use a blanket idea on every individual point of that system. Because healthcare is sudden, unexpected, and impossible to say no to, it falls further into the category of public infrastructure than private enterprise. 

Now, the production and research of medical equipment, technology, and medicines? That I believe should be privatized. Because a hospital can choose which MRI machine it buys. The government is footing the bill, but the military industrial complex really shows what can be achieved when the government works hand in hand with private contractors. 

Sure, there is a ton of pork, but the average citizen gets all the benefit without any of the "cost." (Cost in this question is more of a situational effect. Taxes, no matter how draconian, are fair and predictable and never actually leave individuals destitute. In the Western world at least.) In the same way that your average citizen can no longer afford to pay for their own national defense (Can you buy a Bradly IFV?), the average citizen now has a hard time paying for medical care because, frankly, it's become so intensive and dependent on extremely sophisticated technology. When hospitals are run under a national healthcare system, the priority becomes saving you. In an American hospital today, the priority is making a buck off of you. I'm happy to have a car company making a buck off me--they earned it and I can make a choice at my leisure. But when I'm at the mercy of the doctors, I want not only them but their entire system to have my best interests in mind. 

So how do we go about doing such a thing?

Obamacare is stupid for one reason and one reason only: they're trying to emulate the insurance industry when they're the bad guys and their model sucks ass. It would be easier to just bill the government for everything. Minimal copays. The same way the government pays for a road or a tank. Straight out of their pocket without any of this insurance bullshit. Lawmakers need to understand that the government sucks at emulating or competing with the free market. When you can buy traditional insurance, and the only alternative is regular insurance but government, of course the damn system would fall apart. Stop trying to run the government like a business. Treat it like the gigantic bureaucratic nightmare that it is and just stop trying to compete with the free market. Kick the free market back an integral and be the only interface between the regular citizen and their involuntary healthcare.

What do I mean when I say "back an integral?" 

Well, in math, an integral is a function derived from the area under a curve--or to put it in terms local to this argument, "one step removed, yet still dependent." The military is back an integral from the free market. The government foots the bill, and hires the personnel, but the free market actually does the hard work of building tanks and stuff. There is still a free market here. Companies are still motivated to do the best they can in the most efficient (or job-creating) way. I propose that healthcare also needs to be moved back an integral and an individual who has involuntary medical needs does not need to ruin their financial future with no recourse except "you should have picked better insurance." And what if he had a preexisting condition anyways? And was denied the best insurance? A government doesn't care. Its pockets are deep. 

How will a government pay for this? The American government is no budget king, but how will we find the extra money to pay for all this medical care?

Let me introduce you to "Medical Security." It's like social security, but for medical care! You pay a certain amount out of your paycheck and it goes to a fund just like social security. What makes this different from regular insurance? The government! They don't care about making a profit! All they care about is keeping you alive and happy so that you'll vote for them! See, the government is a tool. It has things that it does well, and it has things that it does terribly. The government sucks at a) making boots and b) designing new footwear. It can't innovate with any regularity. It's bulky, ponderous, and obese. But it has bankroll for days and an interest in the happiness of its citizens. And, crucially to this argument, it doesn't give a damn about profit. 

I do not believe the current president, Biden, has any balls at all, let alone the balls to push this kind of groundbreaking legislation through. A president will have to be seriously beefed to actually manage to shift the entire American healthcare industry. There's a lot of vested interest everywhere in this behemoth of a rotten cow. The insurance companies won't like being shut down, so they'll lobby. Any red state conservative who a) blanket hates the government and b) has never had a life-shattering medical emergency with the debt that incurs will knee-jerk vote against this legislation. So the president who pushes this through will have to be strong and clear-headed. And there are a million ways to screw this up. A million and one, probably. Like Obamacare. That was a fiasco that was caused by Obama being too tame, trying to surgically insert universal healthcare into an already-dead corpse and hope that revives it. What we need is a defibrillator. A pig's heart that has been genetically engineered to work in humans. We need drastic change. 

And, crucially, we need this change without the liberal baggage that comes with ideas like it. I do not believe in universal healthcare because I want people to feel good. I place the independence and self-reliance of the individual above all else. But what happens when you can't rely on yourself? When your own self is damaged by nature or accident and you can't bootstrap your way out of it? What happens when your family is left straddled with life-changing amounts of debt even after you caused them immense pain by dying anyways? 

This is what the government is for. Government and free enterprise should work together (back an integral) to satisfy the real needs of the people. Spread the shock. Healthcare is not a right; it is infrastructure. Just like electricity and bridges are not a right; they're infrastructure. They serve the same purpose. Improve the lives of those using it without trying to gouge them for money. Let the government foot the bill and pay the private companies in your place. The government is a tool, a dangerous one, but when used correctly it can build great things. 

Fairy Opera Chapter 19: Ultimar

 

Ultimar

“Null Friscus! Open the portal to darkness!” Muco swept his hand through the air and a gigantic black portal opened up. Purple swirls floated through the blackness. Two horns appeared through the portal’s upper half, followed by the form of a demon the size of a building.

The demon smashed through the market and knelt beside Muco. “Sir. You called me?”

Muco snapped his fingers. “Can you clean this mess up for us? My master’s souls are being stolen.”

The demon was about to say something when a blast of white energy smashed into its head. The demon staggered, and toppled to the ground. The inquisitor who had turned everyone into zombies stepped forward.

“My goodness!” He cackled. “I didn’t expect to find servants of Baphomet here!” He clapped his hands together and a number of large white angelic beasts materialized. They had hundreds of eyes, spread around their bodies, and even on their wings. The sight of them was far more terrifying than the demon with horns.

Muco’s demon roared with rage and blundered towards the angels. It smashed its fist into one of the angels, but the angel’s wings absorbed the energy of the impact. The angel fired off a beam of pure white. The demon screamed as it staggered backwards.

Muco called out to his demon. “Cover us!”

The demon blocked the angels’ line of sight. Muco, Tae, Jak, and myself started running.

“We need to get to the ship!” Jak sprinted alongside me. “And get out of here!”

A wall of zombies blocked our path, so we stopped running and faced it.

Tae took out her sword. “Looks like we’re trapped here.”

“Not yet!” A shadow fell over the road and the Grand Mahogany rose above us. Jastle stood at the ship’s bow. The ship threw down several ropes, and we grabbed on to them. As soon as we were secured the ship changed direction. With a change in the wind, the ship puled us up and away from the island. As we flew away the zombies reached up and grabbed at us, howling in frustration.

The inquisitor, for some reason, did not send his angels after us. The demon that Muco had summoned lowered itself down into a portal and disappeared. I watched the island as we pulled away.

Before long we were out on open sky. Jak and Tae sat down against a bulkhead, breathing heavily. I leaned against the wheel house.

“We really have to stop getting into messes like this.”

Ami came up to me and hugged me. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

“Yeah.” I wiped sweat from my brow. “So that’s what’s happening. They’re turning entire islands into zombies.”

“And stealing my master’s souls.” Muco crossed his arms. “I wish we had the firepower to stop that inquisitor.”

“Even with that giant demon, we still couldn’t.” Jak looked up. “Those angelic beasts outclassed your demon by a long shot. What were they, by the way?”

Jastle looked out at the island. “They were nilphim. Fallen angels from the realm of light.”

“So the Empire has those beasts on its side.” Jak shuddered.

Jastle shook his head. “They probably have much more than just that. If a low-level inquisitor can summon these, imagine what the higher level inquisitors will be able to summon?”

“What makes you think he was low level?” I stood up and brushed off my pants.

Jastle frowned. “I know because I saw his designation badge. I caught a glimpse of it when we were picking you up. He’s an orange inquisitor.”

“Orange?”

“Inquisitors are ranked according to the rainbow. Apparently it’s reminiscent of the God Emperor’s promise to free mankind.”

“So it goes red-orange-yellow-green-blue-purple?” I was a bit aghast.

“If you say it like that where an inquisitor is in earshot, you could be culled.” Jastle shrugged. “But you’re deep in the mud anyways so it shouldn’t matter.” He stood up. “Captain, your orders. We’re heading for Rebellion territory. Should we continue onwards without restocking at an island along the way? Or should we risk another stop?”

I thought for a moment. “Let’s skip the resupply. We have enough food to make it to Rebellion territory, even though it’s not the best quality.”

Jak and Jastle looked at each other. “Okay.” They went about issuing orders to our sailors. Soon we changed tack and were heading to the east, where the rebellion was.

It took us two weeks of sailing to leave Imperial territory. When we were beyond the borders of the Empire, we relaxed a little bit. There was little chance that an Imperial inquisitor would chase us this far.

About three days after leaving Imperial territory, another ship came within view. They hailed us, and we sailed up next to them. They were a trader ship operating from the country of Illum. They gave us information about the Rebellion, which was headquartered about two day’s sail to the north. We thanked them and then headed for the location.

The island on which the Rebellion was headquartered was about as large as Grand Castle. We hadn’t prepared beforehand or even told the Rebellion that we were coming.

Something seemed wrong. When we approached the island, there were no other ships. The docks were empty. There was no one anywhere. We pulled into the docks and moored to a pier. Jak, myself, Ruby, and Tae left the ship as an away party.

The place was eerily silent. Nothing could be heard. The whole place seemed like it had been totally abandoned. It was a familiar devastation.

“They go to the rebels.” Jak gritted his teeth. “They caught them and killed them all.”

“We’re out of options, then.” I looked around the deserted street. “The Rebellion was supposed to be our savior. We were supposed to join them and attempt to overthrow the Empire.”

“That’s what I imagined as well.” Jak grimaced. “But it looks like the Empire headed us off.” He sat down on a chair that stood in front of a shop.

A man poked his head out from the shop. “Hello.”

Jak jumped, startled. “Ye gods, man. You scared me.” He shook his head. “Who are you? Can you tell me what happened here?”

The man was bald, and had bright blue eyes. He wore a tattered jacket and long, patched pants. “The name’s Allen. This place has been deserted for years. What are you doing here?”

“Do you know what happened to the Rebellion? They were supposed to be headquartered here.”

“They all died. They were purged by the Empire.”

“How long ago?”

“Ah, about six months ago.”

“So that was before we even started this journey.” I was overwhelmed with hopelessness. “We came here for nothing.”

“You know, I hate the Empire as much as you do.” Allen sat down across from Jak. “But I can’t help you start up a new Rebellion. Not when the Empire can crush it just like that.”

“Did you have a part in the Rebellion?”

“Me?” Allen shrugged. “I was the hero who was prophesied to take the Empire down. Somehow I was in the basement of the castle and fell asleep when the attack happened. I woke up and everyone was gone. No bodies, just signs that an epic battle had taken place. I knew it was the Empire because of their arrows.”

“So you’ve been here alone for six months.” I blinked a few times, trying to process what I was hearing. “And you’ve been alone ever since.”

“Yeah, they took all the skyworthy ships.” Allen sighed. “And I’m just about to run out of food, so I’d appreciate it if you took me aboard and brought me home.”

“You do realize that we’re on the run from the Empire?”

“Yeah? You have food though, right?”

“We do.” I sighed. “Okay. Welcome aboard, Allen. I’m the captain here and we’re on a mission to defeat the Empire.”

“A lofty goal that I support.” Allen stood up. “By the way, how did a young fellow like you become captain?”

“Our previous captain, who we lost in a battle with an Imperial cardinal, wanted it that way.” I stood up and clapped Allen on the shoulder. “In any case, we’re going to search this whole island. We need to find supplies. We have food, but it’s pretty nasty stuff at the moment. Just a lot of hard tack and some stale lime juice.”

Allen sighed. “Yeah, I can help you gather whatever food we have left. Everything that could spoil did spoil.”

For the next few hours, we searched the island, looking for food and supplies that we could collect and use. When we were done we piled back onto the Grand Mahogany. In the captain’s quarters, all our leaders were gathered.

“We have two choices.” Jak put his fist on the table. “We can return to the Empire and live as fugitives. Or we can cross the Great Cloud Sea and make it to Illum. I have only heard of two ships that ever managed to pass through the Great Cloud Sea unharmed. Since the Grand Mahogany is a relic ship, I believe we will be able to make it. However, that is not guaranteed. If we instead turn to piracy and living on the run, we could survive for an indefinite period of time. We have the resources. However, I believe that would be the cowardly way to do things.”

One of our sailors came into the captain’s quarters. “I’ve sighted something!”

“Tell us, Yarrow.” Jak turned to him.

“I’ve spotted something. Something huge! Bigger than anything I’ve ever seen before!”

We left the captain’s quarters and looked off at the western horizon. A gigantic ship, made of black metal, broke through the clouds surrounding the Great Cloud Sea. It was flying the Empire’s flag. The ship was massive. Bigger than some sky islands, it drifted towards the Great Cloud Sea. There must have been thousands of cannons on it.

Allen whistled. “Now that’s something I’d never thought I’d see.”

“Do you know what that is?”

“The Empire’s secret weapon. The Ultimar.”

“Why is it here?” I shielded my eyes from the sun, which was glaring off of the ship’s smooth sides.

“I think they intend to invade Illum. A ship like that can just tear through the Great Cloud Sea like it’s paper.” Allen sighed. “Well, that means that a dark age is going to fall over the country of Illum.”

“Is there anything we can do?”

“Against something like that?” Allen shrugged. “I mean, if you want to. But there’s nothing I can imagine that would allow us to stop that thing. There must be tens of thousands of soldiers on that thing. There’s no way.”

Jak and Jastle looked at each other, and then at me. “You’re the captain now.” Jak looked up at the gigantic ship. “You make the decision.”

“That thing. It’s going to be gone from the Empire, right?” I turned to Allen. “You were the prophesied hero. You’re pretty strong, right?”

“Well, I mean, in a normal fight, yeah, I’m pretty strong.”

“Then we’re going to create a new Rebellion. One that won’t lose to the Empire so easily. We’re going to fulfill your prophecy and mine, and then we’re going to save the world from the God Emperor.”

Allen clapped his hands together. “That’s the spirit. I would have given up hope after seeing that thing. By the way, why hasn’t it attacked us?”

“To it, we’re just a tiny merchant ship or something. We’re not worth their time.” Jak lifted his chin. “In any case, this means we’re heading back into Imperial territory. I know a few people who can help us gather the manpower we need to even consider fighting against the Empire.” He turned to the sailor at the helm. “Hard to starboard! We’re headed back!”

The ship listed, and we turned away from the gigantic Ultimar. I knew we would have to face that gigantic superweapon eventually, but for now we had to bide our time.

 

Fairy Opera Chapter 18: Death of a Good Man

 

Death of a Grand Man

We piled into the dinghy. Jastle cast an invisibility spell over us and we pulled away from the walls. The Grand Mahogany waited to accept us just out of sight from the castle.

When we got on board, everyone was silent. Tae looked like she was about to cry. I was about to cry as well. Ami hugged me.

“Rock.” Ami pulled back. “You saved me. But I know you also lost a friend.”

I shook my head. “He knew the dangers going in. There’s nothing else we could have done.”

Ami shuddered and sat down on the deck. “I … Malgor wasn’t that bad to me. He never hurt me. I can’t believe he’d do something like that.”

“He didn’t hurt you?”

Ami shook her head. “He was going to perform some sort of ceremony with me. I think he wanted to summon a devil through me.”

“Summon a …” I tapped Ami on the head. “Then you’d better be glad we came for you in time.” I paused, and then started staring of into space.

“Do you think he’s really dead?” Tae put her hands on my shoulders. “Do you think that would have actually killed him? He’s a super resilient person. That couldn’t have actually killed him.”

“I think he’s dead.” Jastle crossed his arms. He seemed to be holding back his emotions. “That blow would have killed anyone.” He shook his head. “In any case, we’re gathering in the command room. Rock, you’re going to be our captain from now on. I trust that you’ll make the best decisions.”

“I understand.”

We went into the captain’s quarters. Jastle leaned on the table in the middle of the room with both hands. “At this point, we have two choices. Either we find an island that is hospitable to people the Empire is hunting for, or we join the rebellion.”

“I say we join the rebellion.” I balled my hands into fists. “I don’t know much about them, but I do know that the Empire will hunt us down if we don’t protect ourselves somehow.”

“Right.” Jastle turned to Tae. “How about you?”

“I agree with Rock.”

Jastle looked at Muco and Burgon. “How about you? Do you think we can complete the quest your master gave you with help from the Rebellion?”

Muco crossed his arms. “We don’t know much. We’re willing to go with you as long as you’re still actively looking into the matter.”

Burgon nodded. “I agree with my comrade.”

Jastle took out a map. “Then we’re going to have to head east. That’s where the Rebellion was last time I checked.”

“How long will the journey take?” I peered over the map.

Jastle pointed to an island near the edge of the map. “From where we are now, it will take about a month. We’re going to need to resupply at Crackle Island.”

“Okay. Let’s get that done.”

The meeting ended. I left the captain’s quarters and walked onto the aft deck, staring out at the sky. Before I knew it, tears were flowing down my cheeks. Ruby flew over to me and landed on my shoulder.

“I know it’s sad. You didn’t know him for long, but he was a good friend to you.”

I gripped the railing. “He was better than I knew.”

“But you managed to save your sister.”

“I know.” I was silent for a long while.

Ami came up next to me and leaned against the railing. “Rock, are you okay?”

“Yeah.” I wiped my face. “I’m okay. I did everything to protect you, and now that you’re back, I can relax.”

Ami hugged me. “Thanks for coming for me.”

Jak clapped both of us on the shoulder. “The family is reunited!” He laughed. “In any case, who would have thought that we’d be joining the Rebellion?”

“I never wanted to, but I think the Empire has forced our hand.” I sighed. “In any case, we’ve got a bit of down time before anything happens.” I pulled away from the railing. “It smells like Tae is cooking something.”

Jak, Ami, and I went down to the mess hall, where a number of sailors had already gathered. Tae was in the kitchen baking a cake.

“I didn’t know this ship had an oven.” I leaned over the counter that separated the kitchen from the mess.

Tae grinned. “This is a relic ship, remember? It’s got a lot of things that a normal ship doesn’t have.”

Muco and Burgon climbed down to the mess. They stood on either side of me. “Your cook really does know how to make good food.” Muco clapped me on the back. “Come on, lad. Come sit with us.”

I sat down with Muco and Burgon. Muco leaned forwards. “So, technomage. Tell me what you know about Scode.”

“I really know nothing more than your average magician.” I shook my head. “Somehow or another my understanding of the language merged with my understanding of Common.”

Muco leaned back. “That’s surely interesting. I’ve heard of several technomages from the time before, but I’ve never met one in person.” He chuckled. “I’ve been alive a long, long time.”

Burgon stretched his arms. “What I want to know is how you’re able to cast spells without reading them from scrolls.”

“I don’t know.” I shook my head. “I really don’t know.”

Ami sat down next to me. “Who are these people?”

“They’re generals of Hades. Servants of Baphomet. They’ve joined us in exchange for our help in figuring out how the Empire is stealing souls.”

Ami looked at them and bowed. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Muco and Burgon looked at each other and then at Ami. “It’s our pleasure.” Burgon bowed.

“Pie’s ready!” Tae pulled a steaming-hot pie out from the oven and placed it on the counter.

Muco and Burgon cheered. “We love your pie, Ms. Tae!” Muco gulped down a flagon of beer and slammed it on the table before getting up and grabbing a piece of pie. Burgon followed afterwards.

Everyone got a piece. It was peach pie, made from preserved peaches that we had loaded aboard at Anerville. We hadn’t even known what we were loading in the chaos, so it was lucky that we managed to score something like this.

The mess hallway was filled with boisterous voices. The sailors seemed to be having a great time. We had food, we had a mission, and we were ready to get started.

The next morning, Jak approached me. “I know Orion was the one teaching you sword skills, but now that he’s gone, someone has to teach you how to fight.” Jak cracked his knuckles. “Now, I used to be an adventurer. I had the name Crimson Blade.” He shrugged. “Sorry I never told you.”

“It’s fine. I wouldn’t have believed you anyways.”

“Cheeky boy.” Jak then sighed. “But I’ll teach you what Orion no longer can. You need to learn how to handle a sword if you’re ever going to have a chance at survival.” He took out one training sword and tossed me another. We began sparring practice for that day.

The next two weeks were uneventful. Jastle taught me magic, Jak taught me swordsmanship. The ship headed inexorably towards Crackle Island.

Occasionally, Jastle would retreat back to his quarters for a while to work on his experiments. One day I asked if I could follow him.

“Sure, sure.” Jastle waved his hand. “I’ll let you see what I’m doing. You’re the one who’s paying me for it, after all.”

We entered Jatsle’s quarters, which were the quarters of the former first mate. It wasn’t a large room, but it was sizable enough for a ship. The whole room was covered in glass bottles, mixers, pipes, and other paraphernalia. Greenish and reddish liquids bubbled in containers. Smoke billowed from cones. Something hissed.

Jastle sat down in the chair facing one of the glass assemblies.

“What are you doing?” I leaned over Jastle’s shoulder.

Jastle lifted up a bottle of blue liquid. “I’m attempting to improve upon the health potion.”

“Health potion?”

“They’re very rare right now because of how difficult they are to produce. If you take one, your injuries will heal much faster. If I manage to find a way to easily create them, I could become rich.”

“So you’re not doing this for the greater good?”

“Why would I? That doesn’t benefit me.”

I sighed. “Okay. Yeah.” I looked at the glass bottles full of liquid that were on the table. “Hey, you messed up your ratios on that one?”

“Really? I did?” Jastle looked at me. “Okay then. Tell me the actual ratio.”

“You need a three to one ratio. The substrate needs an abundance of reactant. Also, you need to heat the mixture to about ten degrees hotter.”

“Where did you learn that, kid?” Jastle appeared a bit surprised.

“I don’t know. I just feel that this is the right way to go.”

Jastle nodded. “Okay then. I’ll try it.” He mixed the chemicals in the way I told him to. The resultant product was a dark purple, cloudy liquid. Jastle swirled the liquid in its container. “I think this is it. This is the right mixture.” He turned to me. “Kid, you’ve done great. Why don’t you help me out from now on?”

“Okay.”

For the next two weeks, we continued to sail, with my new place as Jastle’s lab assistant. Jak continued to teach me swordsmanship.

We arrived at Crackle Island about three weeks out from Grand Castle. The island was bustling.

Jastle approached me. “I’ve been forging some documents that will allow us to dock at the regular docking yard. Be sure to keep the real name of the ship hidden. The ship is right now known as the Guardian Angel.”

“Got it.”

“And if anyone asks, Jak is the captain.” Jastle lowered his chin. “You got that?”

“I got that.”

We brought a small party ashore. Jak, myself, Tae, Ruby in her gem form, and Muco. Dwarves were actually not that uncommon in the Empire, and were treated almost exactly like humans. We went down to the market.

Just as we were about to buy something, I heard a scream coming from the direction of the castle. The whole market started surging away from the castle.

A single Imperial inquisitor walked down from the castle area, holding a large white orb in his hand.

I pulled out a scroll. I had, in my free time, prepared for something like this after what I had heard at Anerville. The white orb. I had devised a way to defeat it.

“Null Orb. Retain soul, defend against black.” A small shield grew around us. I grabbed Tae and Jak and hugged them close to me.

The people in the market started collapsing to the ground. The orb radiated an energy that turned the eyes of its victims back into their heads. Then, a few moments later, they rose from the ground as zombies and started attacking the surviving people. The whole market was being turned undead. The inquisitor, a man in a black robe that covered his face, continued to walk along the market path. More and more people were converted into undead.

Several of the stall owners hid behind their merchandise. One of them looked at us and waved his hand.

I pulled Tae and Jak down next to him. Muco followed. We hunkered down beneath a crate of apples while the entire market was changed into zombies.

“Those damn Imperials.” Jak gritted his teeth. “They just don’t know when to stop.”

Muco grumbled. “So this is how my master’s souls are being stolen.” He rubbed his hands together. “I think I have a solution to this.” He stood up and pulled a scroll out. “Here goes!”

 

19

***

Fairy Opera Chapter 17: Castle

 

Castle

Orion used the stars to figure out where, exactly, we were. When he finished, he put away his astrolabe and called a meeting in the captain’s quarters.

It was myself, Tae, Orion, Jastle, Ruby, and Muco.

Orion crossed his arms. “We’re about the same distance from Grand Castle as we were before we entered the black zone. We have a decision to make. Do we head straight for Grand Castle, or do we investigate what’s happening with the zombies and the Empire?”

“I vote we save my sister first.” I planted my hand on the table. “We need to save her before she’s gone.”

“Okay.” Orion turned to the other members. “I know this whole journey was started for that purpose. But we’ve got another quest we need to complete.”

Muco crossed his arms. “I agree that we should save this boy’s sister. It would do us no good if our most powerful asset were to lose effectiveness due to worry.”

“I wasn’t expecting that from you, Muco.” Orion nodded. “I agree. We should save Rock’s sister.”

“Then we’re unanimous.” Tae nodded.

“Agreed!” Ruby flew onto the table. “Let’s set course for Grand Castle!”

The next two weeks went by as usual, with lessons from Jastle and Orion about swordsmanship and magic use. Also, Burgon taught me how to use a bow. I wasn’t very good at it to start, but Burgon’s teaching methods were effective. Soon I was able to actually hit a target. The Grand Mahogany had a deck space specifically designed for archery practice.

On the second week, the island of Grand Castle came into sight. Orion stopped the ship. Him, Tae, myself, Jastle, and Ruby piled into a small dinghy. We made the journey across open sky to the island’s less inhabited side. A massive wall surrounded most of the island’s edge, but the spot where the secret passage was located was hidden beneath the wall on the east side. Several guards were on lookout, but Orion had cast an invisibility spell around us. He then cast a spell that created a small pigeon—it was a spell that I had developed for the purpose of setting off the fireworks on the other side of the castle. The pigeon held a few scrolls that were set to automatically go off at the mention of a command word. It flew away, above the walls, and was not noticed by the guards. The sun began to go down. When night had fallen, the fireworks went off. They bloomed in the sky on the other side of the castle.

“Quick, quick!” Orion pushed us off the boat and across the grass outside the wall. We pressed against the stone as Jastle walked slowly along the wall’s edge, tapping it. Then he stopped.

“It’s here.” He pressed hard against the wall and a small door opened. Jastle went in first. The rest of us followed. The hallway we entered was pitch black. Orion cast a light spell, illuminating the path. The walls were covered in slime. Rats skittered back and forth beneath our feet. It seemed that this passageway hadn’t been used in quite some time.

“We’re going to have to figure out where Ami is.” I followed Orion through the narrow tunnel.

Orion nodded. “They probably have a list of names and places in the main office. If we can infiltrate them, then we can search for her name.”

“Are you sure they’ll record it?” Tae followed behind me.

“I’m sure. The Empire is persnickety about these things.”

We came to a crossroads. Jastle consulted his map, and then he pointed in the direction we were supposed to go. We came to a series of stairs with a trapdoor at the top. Orion held his finger up for us to be quiet and climbed the stairs. He pushed the trap door open a slight amount. With a few glances, he scouted the area. Then he nodded and pushed his way through. The rest of us followed. We came up into a store room filled with food and weapons.

Orion walked up to a rack of swords and whistled. “Don’t mind if I do.” He took an ornate-looking sword with a curved blade. “Since we’re not here to do business anyways, I may as well take this.” He pulled the corresponding sheath from the wall and strapped it to his side, sliding the sword into it.

Jastle sighed.

We continued through the lower levels of the castle according to Jastle’s map. When we reached the middle levels, we had to start being stealthy. The occasional soldier would pass through, causing us to hide behind the nearest shelter—of which there was plenty. The whole place was quite cluttered. Boxes, racks, shelves, cabinets. The place was a mess.

We reached the door to the office. Orion knelt beside it and took a small cannister out from his pocket. He cracked open the door to the office and tossed the device in. A hissing sound came from behind the door, followed by violent coughing. After two minutes Orion nodded and we pushed our way into the office. The two clerks who were in there lay passed out on the floor. Orion gave us a signal. He and Tae kept watch right next to the door. Jastle, Ruby, and myself searched the office for the record of the dungeon. After a furious couple of minutes, we found it. Then we searched for my sister’s name. It wasn’t there.

I began to lose hope. But then I noticed a small note attached to the desk’s side. Bring calling scroll to cell 134. Remember that she’s an asset.

That had to be about Ami. It had to, I felt it in my gut. I pulled the note off of the desk and showed it to Jastle.

“I agree. It’s our best shot.” Jastle called back Orion and Tae. Ruby landed on my shoulder.

“Okay. We know where she is now. We just have to get her back.”

“Right. But the dungeon level is straight across from the operational area. We’ll be going through a nest of activity. They’ll be bound to spot us.”

Orion looked up. “What about if we use that?” He pointed to an air vent above us.

“I don’t have a map of those.” Jastle shook his head.

“I’m fairly certain that those vents travel the same network as the corridors.” Orion grimaced. “We have to take the chance.”

“Okay.” Jastle went first, climbing up onto a chair and forcing his way into the vent. It was a little tight for him, but he was able to get through. I went next, then Tae, then Orion. We clambered along the vent network, following Jastle’s lead. Through the vent openings, I could see various operations being carried out within the castle.

“Wait.” Jastle stopped. “Look down there.”

I looked through the vent’s opening down at a room that looked like a lab. In it, scientists were working on a gigantic beast that appeared to be stitched together from dead body parts. A number of zombies were held in chains against the wall.

“They’re doing something. Like they’re preparing for a war.”

“A war? With zombies?” I did my best to whisper.

“Yes. These are the souls that Baphomet said were being stolen from him.”

“Our mission is to rescue Ami, though.” I looked away. “We can let someone else deal with that.”

We continued to climb through the vents, eventually making it to the dungeon sector. We crawled along them until we reached the cell block we were looking for.

Cell 134. I climbed out of the closest vent and walked up to the door. I had designed a lock picking scroll just for this purpose. Using it, I unlocked the door.

Ami was inside, laying on a hard stone bed with a thin blanket over her. She looked up.

“Rock.” She sat up. “You came for me.” She threw off her blanket and ran up to hug me. “Thank you.”

“We’re not out of this yet.” I looked back at Orion, Tae, and Jastle.

“Who are these people?” Ami looked at them.

Ruby flew out from my pocket and hovered in front of Ami’s nose. “They’re friends.”

“A fairy!” Ami laughed.

I was so glad to see that she was okay. She had a few bruises, but she looked to be in good spirits. I grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the room.

Before I could orient myself, I heard boots on the ground. Orion and Jastle looked at each other.

Orion grimaced. “We’re going to have to fight our way out. They probably discovered the unconscious clerks.”

Ami clenched her fist. “I’m not going back there!”

I pulled Ami in the opposite direction of the footsteps. “Jastle! Tell us where to go!”

“The only viable path is right through the barracks!” Jastle started running beside me.

Tae and Orion followed. We sprinted along the hallways, taking turns as Jastle told us.

We sprang out through a door and right into the middle of a soldier’s barracks. About a dozen soldiers looked at us with incredulity.

Orion grabbed another cannister. “Close your eyes and cover your ears!” He tossed it.

I closed my eyes and covered my ears. The bang that followed was blisteringy loud. I could see my hands through my eyelids. Then the light faded. When I opened my eyes, all the soldiers in the room were reeling.

Orion led us through the barracks and back out into the hallway. Jastle led us down another corridor.

We stopped. There, in front of us, was Cardinal Malgor. His bright red eyes stared at us as he readied his sword.

Jastle, myself, Orion, and Tae took up positions around him.

“Four against one.” Malgor took a step towards us. “It’s an even fight, then.” He darted towards Jastle. Jastle blocked Malgor’s sword, sending sparks flying. Jastle’s sword rang against the wall. He staggered backwards. Tae moved to fill the gap. She struck twice, both shots blocked. Malgor pulled a second sword from his belt. He took a stance and attacked Jastle. Jastle rolled underneath the sword and recovered his own weapon.

Orion struck at Malgor. Malgor grabbed the blade with his gauntlet and ripped it out of Orion’s hand. Orion backed off.

I moved in. Using my new sword skills, I engaged Malgor for a few seconds. He slashed me on the leg and send me reeling backwards. Blood splattered on the ground.

Tae approached Malgor and exchanged a few blows. She struck him on the arm, but his armor deflected it. Malgor then kicked Tae’s feet out from under her. Tae fell backwards, slamming into the wall.

Malgor engaged Orion. He feinted a blow and then slashed. Orion gasped. He held his hand to his chest and pulled it back covered in blood. Gritting his teeth, he came back at Malgor. Malgor blocked every blow that Orion made.

Jastle ran from behind Malgor and tried to stab Malgor’s back. Malgor moved to the side and caught Jastle’s sword in his armpit. Jastle tried to yank it out, but couldn’t, so he backed away.

Orion and Malgor exchanged a few more blows. Malgor pulled out a scroll. “Null stop! Paralysis, library seven, decimate!”

“Apac!” Orion pulled out a scroll just in time. Both beams of magic canceled each other out. Before Orion could recover, Malgor skewered him.

Orion grasped the sword in his belly. “Run! Everyone, run!”

“We can’t leave you!” I tried running towards Orion, but Tae pulled me back.

“He’s sacrificing himself for us!” Tae gripped my hand and pulled me as she ran.

Ami, myself, Jastle, Tae, and Ruby ran away from the battle. Malgor watched us go, his eyes blazing, not chasing. The last thing I saw of Orion was him collapsing to the ground in a pool of blood.

 

18

***

Why, even though I'm all for free markets, I believe that farm subsidies are necessary

 Here's the rub. Farm productivity has risen so dramatically over the past century that we, as humans, are capable of producing orders of magnitude more food than we need. Two things collide in the economy of farming that create a perfect storm of problems. First, there is the fact that farms take at least six months from planning to production. Second is that supply and demand fluctuations encourage immediate action. In order for supply to meet demand, there must be space for that supply to fluctuate as it gets used to knowing what kind of product the market will absorb. Sometimes, there will be surpluses. Sometimes, there will be shortages. 

However, unlike with computer chips, a true shortage of food is unacceptable. If too many farmers plant wheat this year, and the price of wheat drops so low that no one plants for next year, then next year we will have either very high food prices or no food at all. When you are making smartphones, you can adjust your production numbers fairly quickly, and no one is going to die from a smartphone shortage. However, food shortages are a bad deal. 

Subsidies artificially increase supply of a commodity. This creates a "base level" of food production that, no matter market conditions, can be reliably drawn upon. 

To a farmer, having the security of knowing that your grain will sell for a guaranteed baseline price motivates you to plant that crop anyways. And while I don't advocate this method of production for any other business, when it comes to food, security is more important than efficiency. A government must supply its citizens with bread and circuses. This has never changed and probably won't ever change. While I think direct price controls would be counterproductive, I believe that paying someone to not grow corn and promising to buy the corn that is produced regardless of market conditions will give a ground level of food that is always being produced, even if it must be destroyed most of the time. Because food production is such an investment in the future, and because the effects of a shortage would be so severe, I believe that this one industry should be allowed government interference through subsidy. 

Here's why the salary of a CEO doesn't matter to you.

 Walmart employs 2.2 million people. Its CEO earns 22 million dollars a year. If you do the math, that means that if you reduced the CEO's salary to 70k (which is about enough to live on comfortably) each individual employee would earn $10 per year more. For a full time employee, that's less than a penny per hour raise. So when you talk about taking that CEO's salary and giving it to the workers, you're ignoring the very simple fact that there are a lot of workers who also must benefit. Anyone who advocates reducing CEO salary purely because they think it will benefit workers has misplaced their sense of justice. Anyone who thinks that this action can improve the lives of individual workers beyond a negligible amount has not done the math. 

So why do CEOs earn so much money? Why do I support them getting paid so much? 

Well, just like everything else in a proper free market, it's all about supply and demand. Let's say that we reduce the salary of all CEOs to 70k by law. CEOs are now required to get by with what an average American household does. However, being a CEO is stressful. It's competitive. It's important. This will cause something called brain drain, where highly qualified individuals will leave the field and go do things that actually pay them what they believe they're worth. Or, in another case, people with the ability to become CEOs will never head towards that end point. Did you know that the Walmart CEO started out sweeping floors and loading trucks? He climbed up the ladder by proving his competence. His salary grew organically based on his personal ability. 

A company chooses its CEO based on one thing and one thing only: track record. If an individual shows that they can handle the gigantic responsibility of running a multi-million or billion-dollar company, then they will be given that job. Individuals with the drive and savvy to run a huge company are actually quite rare. I'm not one of those people. They have to be willing to work eighty-hour weeks. They have to be willing to manage huge numbers of people and large amounts of money. They must be competent. In a world where salary is not restricted by law (otherwise we'd be in a pretty bad dystopia), a company that pays their CEO less than they should will lose that CEO to something called poaching. If a company commits to only paying their CEO 70k and giving the money to the workers, then a different company with an eye on that CEO will snap them up for 100k. Then another for 200k. Then another for 300k. This repeats until the CEO settles in a job he is worth. Do you think that a money-hungry, profit-driven company will willingly throw away large amounts of capital at a single person just to satisfy that individual person's greed? While this may happen in some cases, the truth is that CEOs make a lot of money because they're worth that much. Treat a CEO as a farmer treats a tractor. Because that's what he is to a company. Any company only invests in something that they believe will cause return. A CEO is not synonymous with his company, not by a long shot. He's an asset to the company, that the company pays for. Just like a minimum wage worker, he is hired to do a job. The real people who get the profits are shareholders. (Hint: that's you!)

Finally, with the math out of the way, it occurs to me that people believe we should "eat the rich" because they think that their individual portion of "the rich" will be more than a single raisin. Let's go through the math. Elon Musk is worth 200 billion. If we eat him, then we'll each get about $750 (Counting all 320 million Americans). If we eat all the rich, then maybe we'll get five thousand each. Maybe. You all know from your stimmy checks that five k really isn't much. Can you live for the rest of your life on that money? Can you buy more than a junk car? Can you afford gas for a year? Can you justify the brain drain that will occur? Do you really think any organization can operate functionally or efficiently without a motivated individual at the helm? Where are all those motivated individuals when you've eaten them all?

Here's the thesis of this article. Don't begrudge other people their success and their money. If you think to yourself that's my money they stole from me then you're falling into a trap. You're just as greedy as they are. You're coveting other people's stuff and coming up with justifications for it to make yourself feel good about it. Unless you're suffering as a medieval peasant while their lord literally takes their stuff and throws lavish feasts, then you're not entitled to other people's money. (No, this isn't the case for the vast majority of western nations, no matter how much you want to twist it that way. I'll argue this point in another post.) Corporations don't take your money and give you nothing in exchange. If you have to justify your ownership of rich people's money because they "took it from you" by "not paying you enough" then you really should reevaluate your idea on the matter. You know that old saying by college professors. 

If you want special treatment, then I'll have to give it to everyone. 

Fairy Opera Chapter 16: Land of Dim Light

 

Land of Dim Light

The serpent licked the air. “This is the land of the dead, of course. But recently dead have been leaking out into the real world. Baphomet does not know how it is happening. Perhaps you can help him sort out this quandary.”

I put my hands on my hips. “I’ll do everything I can. Having the god of the dead owe me a favor would be great.”

“Hm. I like the way you think, technomage.” The serpent disengaged from the ship. “I’ll lead you to the palace, but you’re going to have to go on your own from there.”

“Follow the serpent!” I yelled at Orion.

The helmsman steered the ship towards the serpent. The serpent’s back was just visible as we followed it through the darkness. The air was completely still. The blackness appeared to absorb sound, muffling the voices of the sailors. We followed the serpent for an hour. A gigantic castle appeared in the distance. Its windows were lit with dim red lights, giving it the feeling of a rose.

We docked at the castle’s foot. The serpent lifted its head and faced me. “I have taken you where you need to go. I will be leaving you now.” It slithered away and left the bubble of light around our ship.

I turned to Orion. “We’re going ashore. There’s something important there.”

Orion nodded. “Tae and I will come with you.”

“Me too.” Ruby flew up to me and landed on my shoulder.

“Okay. Our away party is chosen.”

We climbed off the ship and set foot on the docks. A skeleton approached us, its bones clacking as it walked.

“Hello. Welcome Castle Gehenna.”

“We’ve been told to meet with Baphomet.”

The skeleton clacked its jaw. “Very well then. I shall guide you to him. It’s not every day that we get visitors from the corporeal world.”

“Yeah, we weren’t expecting to get here.” We followed the skeleton up a series of steps, reaching a large oak door that was illuminated by two red-burning torches.

The doors opened. The skeleton led us through. The interior of the castle was gloomy, but masterfully decorated. Paintings adorned the walls. A fresco hung from the ceiling. Three chandeliers bathed the room in a soft orange light.

We followed the skeleton up another series of steps until we reached another gigantic wooden door.

“My master is behind these doors.” The skeleton bowed. “I shall wait here for you.”

The doors opened on their own. We walked through. The throne room was gigantic, with high vaulted ceilings and stained-glass windows. The throne was made of pure black stone. On the throne was a dragon. Its black and red scales shimmered in the gloomy light. Its eyes shone with a deep intensity.

“What brings you here, humans?” The dragon spoke.

“We accidentally found our way here through a wormhole.” Orion bowed. “We just want to go home.”

“I am Baphomet, ruler of Hades.” Baphomet shifted slightly on his throne. “People don’t go home from Hades.” He leaned forward. “But perhaps you can help me. I know you accessed the Chaos Box.”

“I think so, yes.” I knelt because I felt like it was the proper action. “What can you tell me about the vision I had?”

Baphomet chuckled. “I do not control the Chaos Box, nor can I see into it. I do not know what others have experienced through it.” He shifted in his seat. “But yes. You can help me, you are very capable of helping me. You see, I’ve been leaking souls as of late. I do not know why, but people who are supposed to be bound for the underworld are escaping in transit and returning to the real world.”

“Like zombies?” Orion bowed. “Your majesty, we’ve already encountered some of these lost souls. The Empire has been experimenting with magic that turns humans into soulless animals.”

Baphomet clacked his claws on the edges of his throne. “That Empire. You’re telling me the God Emperor has decided to snub me? Me, the leader of Hades? By stealing souls that were meant for my realm?” Baphomet blew fire from his mouth. “Very well. If it’s war he wants, then it’s war he gets.” Baphomet slammed his scepter on the ground. “Come forth, my generals!”

Four demon generals stepped out of the shadows and into the red light of the throne room.

“Carnus.” The first general was a fat man wearing heavy plate armor and with black bat wings on his back.

“Burgon.” The second general was a lion demi-human with a thick mane and long teeth. He wore leather armor and held a gigantic pike.

“Arbel.” The third general was a fish demi-human. He wore scale armor and held a trident.

“Muco.” The fourth general was a dwarf with a long beard and golden armor. He held a gigantic hammer.

Baphomet addressed his generals. “The God Emperor has been stealing my souls. We must put an end to this injustice. No one shirks the call of death, not even the God Emperor.” He swept his hand through the air. “Muco and Burgon. You will travel with these humans and assist them in repaying the God Emperor in kind for his theft.”

“Sir!” Muco and Burgon saluted and stamped their weapons on the ground.

“Before you leave, though.” Baphomet tilted his head. “You  must prove to me that you’re capable of handling a quest like the one I’m about to give you.” He clapped his hands. “Summon the dracoline!”

A large cage door started to slide open. Through the door, I could see a beast, about the size of a lion, creeping out of the darkness. Its teeth were gigantic and its claws were the size of daggers.

“You may use whatever technique you wish to defeat the dracoline.” Baphomet chuckled. “If you manage to do it, then I’ll consider you a good ally.”

The dracoline leaped towards Orion. Orion punched it in the chest as it flew towards him. The dracoline flew backwards, but landed on its feet.

Tae drew her sword. I drew mine as well. Orion stood back to back with me.

The dracoline leaped towards Tae. Tae stepped aside, the monster shaving past her by a hairsbreadth. Tae struck the beast with her sword, but the edge bounced off the beast’s hard fur.

Orion attempted to stab the beast as it turned. The sword went in a bit, but the dracoline’s flesh caught the sword, and ripped it out of Orion’s hand.

“It’s got natural armor!” Orion stepped back, hands empty.

I pulled out a scroll. “Null Aqua! Douse, set target one seven two! Cold water!”

A blast of water sprayed all over the beast. The dracoline backed away, its fur dripping.

Orion pulled a dagger from his belt. “This is all I have now, but it’s something.”

“Hurry!” I rushed towards the monster. “Kill it before it dries off!”

“Right!” Tae and I approached both sides of the beast. The beast shook itself, sending water flying everywhere. Tae stabbed it and the sword went through its fur as if it were normal flesh. The dracoline screamed and reared up on its back feet. I got underneath it, grabbed it by its stomach, and slammed it to the ground. Tae stabbed the beast in the jaw as the beast struggled.

Orion leaped towards the beast and drove his dagger into the back of the dracoline’s skull. The dracoline was dead.

Baphomet clapped his hands. “That was impressive! How did you know that dracolines were weak to water?”

I shook my head. “It was an old fairytale that I heard.”

“Good, good.” Baphomet grinned. “You pass the test. Muco and Burgon, board this crew’s ship and guide them out of Hades.”

Muco and Burgon saluted. “Sir!” They led us out of the throne room and back through the gigantic doors. We left the castle and returned to the docks, where the Grand Mahogany was still moored. After climbing on board, we introduced Muco and Burgon.

“They’re going to be traveling with us for some time now.” Orion faced the rest of the crew. “Please treat them as equals.” Orion turned to Muco and Burgon. “Do you two have any sailing experience?”

Muco bowed. “Yes. Both of us do. We will assist with whatever functions you need.”

“First, we need you to guide us out of this darkness.”

Burgon turned to the wheel. “Let me take the helm. I know the currents of Hades like the back of my hand.” He walked up to the wheel.

Orion yelled to the crew. Once the ship drifted off the docks, a slight wind picked us up and pushed us away from the castle. Burgon seemed to know exactly where the wind currents were, steering us along them with an expert touch. We headed straight into the darkness beyond. It surrounded our ship, blocking out everything. Our lanterns were barely enough to light the deck.

The ship bucked. A storm seemed to be approaching. A hail of soot-black rain started falling onto the deck. The rain colored everything with black. It smelled like fire and charcoal.

Muco called out to the crew. “Hold on to something!”

I grabbed the nearest object, a tackle block. Just as I did the ship started twisting and turning, bucking and rocking. It was worse than any storm I’d ever experienced. The ship rode up high air waves, and then plummeted downwards, to the point where my feet lifted off the deck. The soot-black rain continued to fall. In the distance, a small white dot appeared. The dot grew until it was recognizable as a passage out to the open air, out of Hades.

The Grand Mahogany held together long enough to shoot through the portal and back into open sky.

The whole crew cheered. Orion and Tae high-fived. Several sailors howled.

The brightness of day was almost too much to my eyes, which had adjusted to the darkness. But it was light. We were out of the darkness. With two more crew. And I remembered the vision that I had been given. There was something strange about it, an ethereal quality. As if I were watching myself in that picture—though I didn’t know which character was actually me.

Orion approached me. “You played that well. I was afraid that dragon lord was going to kill us.”

“I saw that he was probably a reasonable person.”

“And what made you think that?”

“I don’t know.” I shrugged. “I just got that vibe from him. There’s no other way to explain it.”

“Okay. I’ll believe you. The next time I have to talk with a lord of the underworld, then I’ll bring you.” He nodded and walked away.

Ruby kicked her feet back and forth on my shoulder. “That was amazing. Just like Orion said. You kept your cool. Even cute little me was shaking in her boots.”

“You’re not wearing boots.”

Ruby flew up and poked me on the nose. “It was a metaphor, dummy.” She landed on my head. “That lion man looks really powerful.”

“So does the dwarf.” I looked at Muco, wondering about him—it was the first time I’d ever seen a dwarf in real life.

Ruby scoffed. “He looks more wise than strong. I thought you said you could judge people well.”

“Hm. You may have a point.” I turned away.

Jastle walked up to us. “We don’t know where we are right now. We could be anywhere in the world after going through that portal. And we can’t figure out where we are yet until nightfall.”

“Right. So I think we should just stay here until night falls.” I nodded. “Relay that to everyone. We’re sticking where we are until we can figure out exactly where we came out.”

“Got it.” Jastle turned around. “Orion! We need you here!’

Orion approached us. “Yeah. I got the message.” He put his hands on his hips. “I had the same idea.” He leaned against the railing. “But we’ve got a bit of time to kill.”

 

17

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Why the trick to supply and demand is in its communication power.

 I was reading this paper by Melvin Conway (not the game of life Conway). In it he states that the product of a design team creates an imprint on the product that simulates the communication structure of that design team. Thus, the more subunits a team has, the more rigid the possible answers to the question the team is trying to answer; everything in the finished product aligns with the communication structure of that team. So if one team creates and engine and another team creates wheels, you have made the choice that the engine and wheels will not have any significant overlap in their function or design. Thus, you rule out all possible end products where the engine is in the wheel, or the wheel has some major effect on the function of the engine.

There's a law called Brook's Law that states that, when assigning new members to a team of designers, you also increase the amount of effort taken to communicate, which adds to the overall time for production and decreases efficiency 

Now I'll go for an anecdote. In Nazi Germany, the fascist government allocated resources through a massive clerical workforce. Every company that wanted resources allocated to them submitted paperwork for that resource and competed with others through assessment of necessity, which was decided by an overseer. This essentially turned the entire German economy into a massive committee. That committee was only able to create things that aligned with its communication structure; in other words, it lacked flexibility. This was because, according to Brook's Law, adding manpower to a late project makes it later. When your economy is one big committee, Brook's Law states that it will lose efficiency because communication time starts to increase dramatically, and one cannot change that fact.

So then, why is a free market more efficient? Because communication about the necessity of resources between interested parties is handled by an automatic outcropping of each individual's actions. "Vote with your dollar" is the cliché, but I think it can be described better. Each dollar changing hands in exchange for resources or services creates a "ripple" that combines with every other ripple and creates an overlapping waveform that can be interpreted at a glance. If an oil field somewhere across the world closes production due to a strike, then the price of oil goes up. Thus, an individual without knowledge of the event in any capacity, sees the higher prices and decides not to take that vacation road trip across the US. In the end, even though no party made the telegram, information about the change in gasoline supply was communicated through higher prices and ultimately prevented the frivolous waste of a now-more-scarce commodity. This is the core mechanic of the free market. Adam Smith's "invisible hand" is actually an aggregate communication device that collates input, output, and necessity into a single easily-understood value that individuals are highly motivated to pay attention to. 

So why does communism not work? Because a communist government tries to replace this organic information system with human effort. Brook's Law, here, throws a wrench into those works. The more humans you throw at a problem, especially without proper groundwork (i.e. purges, corruption, idealism), the less efficient the system will become. The failure of communism is as simple as that. No human or system of humans can replace the naturally-occurring information distribution network of supply and demand-based pricing indexes. Conway's Law and Brook's Law converge to create a system of government that is simultaneously stuck in its tracks, impossible to shift, and horrible at allocation of resources. 

In the end, free markets work because no one is trying to make them work. They are just individual agents who are out to make the best lives for themselves. Through the communication power of floating commodity and service prices, individuals are given all the information they need to make decisions that not only benefit themselves but also, unwittingly, everyone else associated with that sector of the economy. 

I'm not saying that a completely unregulated free market is best. As long as an economic system's main pathway for the dissemination of information regarding the scarcity, availability, and necessity of goods and services is a free floating index, and as long as individuals can use their currency to purchase those goods and services from anyone in good faith, then said system can handle a few laws that restrict its operation. As long as the spirit of the free market is intact, then the economic system will flourish.

Fairy Opera Chapter 15: Dark

 

Dark

“Fireworks.” I looked at Orion.

“Fireworks?” Orion tilted his head. “Why would you want to set off fireworks?”

“If you want to distract someone, pull off a fireworks show! On the opposite end of where we’re entering. Preferably at night.” I put my fist on the table. “If we distract all the guards on the walls for ten minutes, it would let us slip into the passageway.”

“Right.” Jastle nodded. “I don’t know if anyone in the Inquisition or Church of the God Emperor knows about the passageway, but we can’t be too careful.”

I looked around the room. “Is everyone agreed?”

“Agreed.” Orion clapped his hands. “That’s great. Except for one thing. Does anyone know how to create fireworks?”

I grinned. “I can create some spells that will do the job.”

Orion laughed. “You’re kidding.” He paused. “You’re kidding, right? No one would use magic for something like that, right?”

Jastle looked at Orion. “I think he’s being serious, boss.”

I nodded. “I’m going to create a number of fireworks spells. It should just be a modification of a fireball spell with a fuse set on it and some color and shape modifying libraries.”

Jastle clapped his hands. “You’re doing great, Rock. You’ve become a much better magician than you were just a few weeks ago.”

I smiled. “Yes. And we’re going to save my sister no matter what.”

Orion and Jastle looked at each other and nodded.

Orion clapped his hands. “We’ve got a few weeks to prepare as we head to Grand Castle. We’ve got enough supplies to take us there, and luck holding, we won’t have to stop along the way.”

“How are we going to dock our ship? Will there be a secret pirate cove just like Amberpol?”

“No. The entire island of Grand Castle is surrounded by a thick wall. The place is a fortress.” Jastle turned to Orion. “Rock raises a good question. How are we going to get onto the island?”

“We can’t cast an invisibility spell over the whole ship. If it were a small dinghy, then it might work.”

“So we’ll make it a small dinghy.” I nodded. “We’ll park the ship out of eyesight of the island, at least far enough to where they won’t be able to identify it. Then we’ll bring a dinghy to the shore under an invisibility spell. It worked once, it will work again.”

Orion clapped his hands together. “Then we have a plan. Meeting is adjourned, I’m hungry.”

Ruby sat on my shoulder, kicking her feet back and forth. “Rock, you’ve really grown in the past couple of weeks. Before you started this adventure, when I met you, I wouldn’t have expected you to be this proactive.”

“My sister is in danger.” I walked out of the captain’s quarters. “I’ll do anything I can to save her.”

“A man with a mission.”

We went down to the mess hall and ate dinner.

The days on board the Grand Mahogany stretched out endlessly, day after day, with classes from Jastle and Orion. Orion pushed me to the physical limit with each sparring encounter. I grew accustomed to wielding a sword. Orion was a top tier swordmaster, and he was very good at teaching. I worked on the fireworks spells with Jastle in the control room. We tested them out every night to get their color and shape right. Since we were putting on a show for the guards at Grand Castle, I wanted to impress them.

The days turned to weeks. On the third day of the second week, we spotted a ship in the distance. Because we were flying under the law, we did our best to slip by and hoped that the ship didn’t hail us.

But it did. A flag rose from its mast signaling that it wanted to talk. We steered the Grand Mahogany towards the other ship. In about an hour we were right alongside it. But instead of seeing a large number of crew on board, all we saw was a single man. He took out a talking cone and called across to us.

“Are you friendly?”

Orion called back through his own cone. “We are!”

“You’re not pirates?”

“We are not! What is your situation? Where is your crew and your captain?”

“It’s a long story. Do you care to listen?”

“Come aboard. We’ll listen.”

The man got onto a small dinghy and floated across the gap to our side. He climbed out of the ship and stepped on board.

“What happened, man? Where is the rest of your crew?” Orion confronted the sailor.

The sailor shuddered. “We were carrying a secret cargo for the Empire. Bound for Crane Island.”

“You’re not military, are you?”

“No, we’re a contracted merchant marine.” The man coughed. “Whatever was inside that hold broke free one night and stole away the rest of the crew. I was in the crow’s nest and hunkered down. I managed to lock the ones that didn’t escape in the lower hold.”

“So you’re saying that there are monsters on that there ship.” Orion frowned.

“Yes. Please, take me with you. I don’t want anything to do with that ship.”

“What is your name, sailor?”

“Alex.” Alex shivered. “I’m the last survivor of the Red Apple.”

“All right.” Orion looked at the ship. “That ship creeps me out. Let’s get away from it as fast as possible.” He yelled to the pilot. “Turn us around! We’re leaving this ship behind!’

The Grand Mahogany started to shift. We pulled away from the Red Apple.

The Red Apple, however, seemed to have other ideas. A fiery ball of black flame appeared on the hull, enveloping the entire ship. The ball expanded, swallowing the sky between us, and then coming over the Grand Mahogany. The sky turned pitch black. We were sucked into the vortex, our sails fluttering, the deck churning.

Alex screamed in terror as we went through the wormhole. “Help! Ah!”

I gripped the railing as our ship bucked and heaved. Then everything was still. The Grand Mahogany floated in a sea of blackness. A single red dot appeared on the horizon. It illuminated the area around it with a soft glow.

Orion ordered the ship towards the glow. We reached a small dock, made of wood and leading onto solid ground. The Grand Mahogany clacked against the wood and stopped.

Orion turned to me and Tae. “We’re going ashore. You’re coming with us.”

I nodded. “I’ll go where you go.”

Orion, myself, Tae, and several other sailors stepped off the ship and onto the docks. The red glow coming from the top of the mountain in the center of the island illuminated enough to see where we were going. We climbed a mountain trail. There was no sound, no wind, no grass moving. Only our footsteps sounded as we walked.

We reached the shrine. It was a small building with a statue built onto it. Before thinking about how dangerous it was, I stepped towards the shrine and touched it.

I was shown a vision. The entirety of my home burned. My family and friends were enslaved. Everything I had ever known was being destroyed. Then the vision changed. It showed a god-like being coming from the sky and liberating everyone. Then another god being rose from the darkness and challenged the first being. Their battle left the entire world shattered. I was shown this prophecy as a collage of information through pictures, instant knowledge, and a non-speaking intelligence that tailored everything to me.

Then the being spoke. “Rock. You must make a choice in the future. That choice will change the world as you know it.”

“Who are you?”

“That does not matter.” The voice faded away. “Remember who you are. Who you are meant to be.” Then the voice disappeared.

I was sucked back to reality. Orion pulled me back from the altar.

“Got you, boy.” Orion dragged me away from the glowing light.

I coughed. “Orion. I saw something. I saw something amazing.”

Orion shook his head. “Now’s not the time, Rock.” He pointed and I followed his gaze.

A number of monsters made stone, with red cracks flowing across their carapaces, were rising from the dark ground. Their mouths burned with fire, and their teeth glowed with an orange tint. Their eyes looked at us with burning intent.

The monsters lumbered towards us. Our party took up a defensive stance.

“Our mission is to return to the Grand Mahogany.” Orion pulled out a scroll. “Null—” The scroll fizzled. “Damn. They must have some sort of magical protection aura.”

I shuddered. “I’m going to have to design a scroll to get past that.” The monsters came closer. Their footsteps caused the ground to rumble.

Orion burst into a run. “Run! Get under them! Before they stomp us!”

The entire party sprinted towards the monsters. We slipped underneath their carapaces, without suffering any casualties. We then ran helter-skelter down the path we had climbed, the monsters turning to chase us.

We reached the ship, grabbing onto the rigging and climbing for our lives. The ship moved away from the dock. Several of its cannons opened fire on the monsters. One of them caught a cannonball to the face and reared back in pain. The other three monsters stopped at the end of the dock and pawed at the ground. We pulled away from them, and they didn’t follow out into the open blackness.

We sailed onwards into the blackness. The experience at the shrine had befuddled me. I couldn’t really process what I had seen, or what it meant. Those two god-like beings. I knew one of them was surely the God Emperor. But who would have enough power to rival him? And my entire home town. While I didn’t have any family still there, there was the gang that Tae and I were a part of in our youth. Adam, Cure, Barley. They were people that I had spent my entire childhood with. If they were to suffer because of something I did, then it would be the worst form of insult.

The Grand Mahogany continued to sail through the black dark. There were no lights, so we lit lanterns on the deck. There was no horizon. No skyfloor. Nothing to orient ourselves with. The red glow from the shrine faded away into the blackness behind.

A slithering sound came from somewhere to the starboard side. I thought I caught a glance of scales, shining in the dim light of the lantern.

Orion pulled out a scroll. “Null Bravos. Light the way!” A fireball of bright light rose from his palm and illuminated the space where I had caught sight of the scales.

A gigantic serpent was revealed to be flying beside our ship. The serpent slithered onto the ship, wrapping it in its body. The serpent moved its head right up to me and then it spoke. Its whiskers trembled as its nose flared in and out.

“Hello.” It spoke in Scode. “I see you have come across the night realm.”

Tae turned to me, clearly afraid. “What’s he saying?”

“He’s actually just asking us how we’re doing.” I was a bit bewildered.

The serpent moved its head to my side. The head, including the eyes, was about the size of two people. The serpent must have been several hundred meters long. “It’s not often that ships of this size enter into the darkness of Hades.”

“Can you tell us how to escape?”

“To escape, you must prove to Baphomet that you deserve to be released.” The serpent hissed. “I see you have a powerful magic core. If you can defeat the plague that covers this realm, then perhaps the lord will be kindly to you and allow you passage out.”

“Okay. Tell us what we need to do.”

The serpent tasted the air with its tongue. “Very well then.”

 

16

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